Introduction to the Episode

Speaker 1 0:00

Hey guys, this is Sarah with the Preview Alliance podcast. This month, we are replaying our most downloaded episodes. These episodes are the ones that has resonated the most with you guys. So if you're a longtime listener, this is a great refresher. And share this with a friend who may be new. If you're new, welcome, and we hope that these episodes are impactful to you like it has been for others. Thank you for being with us and stay tuned. Hey guys, welcome back to Preview Alliance. It's Sarah and Whitney.

Speaker 2 0:43

Okay so today's topic is going to be mom bod. Oh yay, something we all love, right and when.

Speaker 1 0:47

I say, mom bod, you know everybody thinks different things, so what we're talking about here is maybe just reality of your body if you're becoming a mom, how it has changed, how it will change. Right.

Speaker 2 1:00

And after being a mom, yeah, and you can be 10 years postpartum and still feel like, oh, I've got a mom bod. Well you do because you're a mom.

Speaker 1 1:07

Yeah, you're a mom, so, and it's embracing that your body created life. Yes, and that's a process in itself.

Miscarriage and Body Changes

Speaker 2 1:16

It is, and even to our moms that have experienced infant loss, whether it be a miscarriage, stillborn or IUFD you may have heard that term used in the hospital as well, or even you know neonatal loss after baby is born and baby passes away. You can experience that mom bod stuff too, because your body did change.

Speaker 1 1:36

Oh, and that's I'm glad you hit on that. So I remember it was the first miscarriage at 13 weeks. And 13 weeks was, you know, pretty I was showing.

Speaker 2 1:50

Mm-hmm Hormones were already changing significantly.

Speaker 1 1:54

And I looked that is she pregnant? Is she not? For a long time after, yeah, and then even going back to when I had Will so early and I'll never forget this, and you're still looking very pregnant for a long time.

Speaker 2 2:15

No one really prepares you that you're going to leave the hospital looking about five or six months pregnant.

Speaker 1 2:19

You don't go back to a flat stomach immediately. And I didn't have him with me, and so people would be like, oh, what do you do? And that killed me.

Speaker 2 2:30

Yeah, it's hard.

Speaker 1 2:32

I was like oh my God, I have a kid in the NICU. People still think I'm pregnant.

Speaker 2 2:38

Talk about grief, uh-huh. So to our moms who have lost babies you may hear us talking about this mom bod, it applies to you too.

Speaker 1 2:48

And it's even harder. My heart goes out because I've experienced it in the sense of the miscarriage, but it's just the constant reminder that you don't have that child anymore or that child's situation is not what you wanted.

Speaker 2 3:04

Oh, correct.

Speaker 1 3:04

If it's in the NICU, if it's medically challenged and that your body's that reminder.

Speaker 2 3:09

Yeah, and I've worked with women before who have experienced a miscarriage and they still leak. They still produce, you know, colostrum or breast milk, and they're like can my body not understand that this is no more, because you know it's one of those, they, those, they'll feel like okay, I'm making progress in my grief. I don't feel as devastated as maybe I did two days ago or a week ago, and then something happens and they leak and they're like great, now I feel like I'm right back where I was.

Speaker 1 3:37

I mean, I was still nauseous after both miscarriages and I remember, even with our miscarriages I had known that the heartbeat had stopped on ultrasound in my body. Your body doesn't recognize it. Sometimes they take a while and I felt like such a prisoner trapped in my body and I wanted my body to just be normal. It wouldn't happen that way. So for our listeners, who this resounds with you, our hearts go out because that is so tough.

Speaker 2 4:09

And.

Postpartum Body Challenges

Speaker 1 4:09

I don't feel like people talk about it Agreed and you feel like you know you're grieving, but it's like you also are, just like I don't want my body to be like this right now Correct, and that's valid.

Speaker 2 4:19

Yeah, oh yeah. Who would want that no?

Speaker 1 4:25

Nobody, yeah, oh yeah. Who would want that? No, nobody. So to what do you say to your clients who are like that, what could help them if they're in that section of like feeling like I, I I've lost a child, my, my child's not with me, and like this is my body, like how do we, how do you even like process that?

Speaker 2 4:37

So realize it is going to be grief. We are going to have those physical reminders. I will say if it's one of those that you are leaking claustrum, breast milk, what have you? There are ways to dry up your supply.

Speaker 2 4:51

Yeah, you know, there's the good old cabbage leaves. Yeah, cold compresses things of that nature. What I did to dry myself up is I would put those washable, reusable nursing pads. I'd stick them in the freezer and then put them in a sports bra and wear them that way. So it's a tighter compression. Something called peppermint essential oil can also help dry it up. That may help you feel like I can do something tangible. I can do something productive, something within your control.

Speaker 1 5:15

Yeah.

Speaker 2 5:15

Because not a lot of what has happened to them has been in their control and so you know if it's one of those you're leaking. It's a breast milk kind of thing. Those are a few steps that you can do to drive your supply that might make you feel a little bit better about that.

Speaker 1 5:29

Right.

Speaker 2 5:30

If it's more so that you feel like your stomach hasn't gone back to pre-baby status. You know maybe the weight that you did gain during your pregnancy. However long it's not dropping as quickly as you would like it to. Remind yourself that you are still postpartum. Yeah, even though your postpartum is not the traditional appearance of it. You know you don't have the six-week recovery at home with your newborn things of that nature. You are still postpartum, your hormones are still adjusting, so really try to normalize what you're experiencing right and say, and that it's appropriate for your body to still be in recovery mode.

Speaker 2 6:09

Right, Because, regardless of a first trimester miscarriage, second or third trimester stillbirth or even neonatal loss or baby going to NICU because they were preterm and you're like I still look six months pregnant and people in the elevator at the hospital are saying, hey, what are you do do?

Speaker 1 6:26

and you're like actually my baby's in the NICU or my baby was born sleeping, or you know whatever, fill in the blank, and I think that goes back, and we've said this before it's never okay to comment on someone's body.

Speaker 2 6:39

Don't ask if they're pregnant.

Speaker 1 6:42

None of that. Okay, so we'll turn the conversation.

Speaker 2 6:46

Yeah.

Speaker 1 6:46

So let's say we are just in, everything has went. We'll say status quo, okay. So now we're mom, mm-hmm, we're newborn stage. Okay, I will never forget, looking at myself post C-section with Will, why they had a full-length mirror in this bathroom. Okay, I don't know, that was horrible. And Bill had to help me use the restroom, Mm-hmm, because you can't really like move around. Well, right.

Speaker 2 7:19

No, I mean after any delivery, but especially a C-section yeah, an emergent one at that.

Speaker 1 7:25

I mean I remember we, but especially a C-section, an emergent one at that. I mean I remember we had like my little pain pup. We had the little Foley bag. At that time it was like a whole situation and I stood up in my stomach because you know it's used to. Having the baby in it Felt like my organs were going to drop out of my body. But I looked at myself in the mirror and I was like, oh my gosh, I didn't even recognize her. Yeah, I mean, everything Was different.

Speaker 1 7:50

Was different and I was like I don't want to look at it and I, you know, and I was just like I burst into crying and I still remember that, but it's like that's an extreme version of how I felt, but there's definitely been moments where you're just like I want my body back or I don't want my boobs to sag right now. I have stress marks now. I have a mommy pooch right now, and then you're in the shower and you see the clumps of hair.

Speaker 1 8:18

And that lasts for so long or mine did so long my hair lasted for months and then, when you're growing it back out, oh yeah, the little wispy hairs or mine did so long my hair. Lost it for months.

Speaker 2 8:24

And then, when you're growing it back out, oh yeah, the little wispy hairs, the wispies and, like I, have bangs.

Speaker 1 8:29

but even if you know they turn into, like you know, cabbage patch, doll hair.

Speaker 2 8:34

I was about to say I would just give a little fly away. It was real fun. It was like a little cow lick, but only with a few hairs.

Speaker 1 8:45

Yeah, you could see them and I remember if you wear your hair up, it's like good luck, yeah. So it's like you have this whole other. So you're adjusting to motherhood, you're adjusting to your body, you're adjusting to new relationships now, because there's now, nothing is the same. There's now a person Like if it's you and your partner. Now there's a third person, or even twins, fourth person.

Bounce Back Culture and Expectations

Speaker 2 9:04

Bless you if you are a multiple mama no-transcript.

Speaker 1 9:12

In the beginning you're like okay, I can rationalize, I've got, I gave birth, whatever. You start pushing it out a little bit and I feel like Instagram comes sneaking in and you hear all the bounce back.

Speaker 2 9:27

I hate bounce back culture Can.

Speaker 1 9:29

I just say that yeah.

Speaker 2 9:30

It is. It preys on mamas at the most vulnerable time of their life yeah, when we are sleep deprived we are physically hurting. Our hormones are all over the place. Insane, oh, it's terrible. You know how they always tell you like if we're going into surgery, hey, don't make a big financial decision or anything like that, until you're like 72 hours post-op because of anesthesia. Until you're like 72 hours post-op because of anesthesia.

Speaker 2 9:57

Same thing with postpartum Same, but these Instagram influencers, this bounce back culture will prey on that vulnerability. And because it is a vulnerable time, we're like I do want to bounce back.

Speaker 1 10:09

Yeah, I do want my flatter stomach. Well, for me too. It was like I had no control over anything. So I thought if I could control how I looked, that would fix me.

Speaker 2 10:21

Yeah.

Speaker 1 10:23

And like I remember everybody does this right Like, even if it's just your friend, or like an influencer or someone or celebrity, or like do at the same time yeah, you self-consciously check in on that person, even if you don't know. You're doing it Absolutely, and you're like, oh, look at her, and it looks like she's in her jeans that she wore before she was pregnant. And look at me, I'm still pulling on my maternity pants. Yeah, which no shame Maternity pants. I wore them forever after pregnancy.

Speaker 2 10:51

Absolutely, because, like it's comfortable and also shout out to Old Navy Jeans. They have some stretch.

Speaker 1 10:56

Thank you. Just saying so it's hard because you do that, even if you don't know.

Speaker 2 11:01

You're doing it, absolutely you do it.

Speaker 1 11:04

And especially celebrities. We got to just like map it out here they have trainers, they have chefs, they probably have night nurses and nannies and their whole job.

Speaker 2 11:19

All the things is dependent on, probably on how they look. Oh well, and not to like slam this show or these people, but we look at you know the female dancers on dancing with the stars who you know. Six weeks postpartum, it looks like they have their abs back already. Yeah, well, for starters, that's kind of where their body was to begin with that was their.

Speaker 1 11:33

That was their baseline people do have those like crazy genetics where they are so fit and able. Yeah, and I've seen that.

Speaker 2 11:43

Yeah, and it's like good for you, but that's not me that's not reality, for I would say maybe 90 percent.

Speaker 1 11:47

No, that's like a zebra of life yeah like that's that unicorn right there, which exactly good for them.

Speaker 2 11:55

But again, those people have auxiliary help that your average mama doesn't have, because I don't know about you, but we're kind of paycheck to paycheck. We are a two-income household. I didn't know I have the money to do a salary for a chef a trainer and a nanny. We don't have that kind of income.

Speaker 1 12:14

No. And then, if you go down to it as well, it's like pregnancy and postpartum. Right, that is the second time us women have experienced body changes with our controls. If you go back to puberty, that's our first one. Did anybody enjoy puberty?

Speaker 1 12:29

no, so it's like we kind of forget, like look how hard that was and that was an adjustment for us. Pregnancy, postpartum is the same thing. We don't have really control, we don't, so we have to just. And one thing that um kind of hit hard when I was prepping for this episode was do we have our identity and how we look?

Speaker 2 12:52

I think a lot of us do because, like I'm 36, so I feel like like a lot of us millennials, we grew up in that 90s diet culture, in that early 2000s diet culture of Slim, fast and Dexatran.

Speaker 1 13:07

Weight Watchers.

Speaker 2 13:07

Weight Watchers and all of those things. So it was pushed on us to be a size zero, to be a size two. Don't you dare be a size six.

Speaker 1 13:17

Yeah, that's not acceptable kind of thing.

Speaker 2 13:20

And so it was, I mean, really shoved down our throats from such an early age, and that's all we saw in the magazine covers.

Speaker 1 13:28

Yeah.

Speaker 2 13:28

There wasn't anyone like Lizzo.

Speaker 1 13:30

No.

Speaker 2 13:31

Who was, you know? A plus size woman who people loved.

Speaker 1 13:35

Yeah. And people respected and people didn't body shame. So we're grown. We grew up in the. This is what you have to be.

Speaker 2 13:42

Oh, absolutely, and so it was one of those. We didn't have anybody that was even average sized.

Speaker 1 13:50

Yeah.

Speaker 2 13:51

That was looked at, that was even respected not glorified, but just respected, respected. So we're always kind of beat down up. Should you really eat that cookie, should you?

Speaker 1 14:02

you need to go work that off you need to go earn your calories are still pretty hurtful of comments of like oh, you know, touching like. I remember one of my family members touched my mom pooch. It was like oh, you're working that off, aren't you? And it was like a comment like that, and I was just like what you?

Speaker 1 14:22

know, oh and brenda yeah and there's just like you're supposed to be a mom who has your body back asap. You're supposed to be like on top of at work on top of it with your kids. Your relationship's supposed to be like on top of at work on top of it with your kids. Your relationship's supposed to be great. You're supposed to be doing all this, um, but I feel like people comment on mom's bodies more than they should appropriately and I know I have.

Speaker 1 14:50

I mean I've had two c-sections and um two miscarriages, both required, required D&Cs. So my lower abdominal area probably it's probably never going to be what it was before. Kids and I had some. It was a friend one time and she was talking to me and it was about her stretch marks and she said her son saw the stretch marks and said, mommy, are those your tiger stripes? Because you're so strong like a tiger?

Speaker 2 15:17

And I'm like, yes, that is Absolutely, it is we earn them.

Speaker 1 15:20

We earn them. And so now, you know, for a while I think, when I had my you know, I had to work through EMDR therapy. I had a difficult time seeing my C-section scar. Oh, I'm sure.

Speaker 2 15:30

That's not uncommon.

Speaker 1 15:37

And it just constantly reminded me. But now I can look at it and be like that brought my boys into life and that saved our life.

Reframing Body Image

Speaker 2 15:42

Yes, well, and the thing is, we really shouldn't have an expectation put on us, whether it's self-imposed or society-imposed, for our bodies to go back to what they were pre-kids, because it won't and it shouldn't.

Speaker 1 15:55

And we're never going to be the same person we were before kids exactly, and that's part of growth yeah because we go from not a mom to a mom.

Speaker 2 16:04

Oh so we shouldn't go back to who we were five years ago or you know, however long ago. We are postpartum right because that's not how it is, and and that's okay. We should, as hard as it is, embrace the new us. We are allowed to struggle.

Speaker 1 16:23

Yes.

Speaker 2 16:23

We are allowed to struggle, we are allowed to say, okay, I want to incorporate more exercise, or I want a more balanced variety of foods. That is fine, that is healthy, that is healthy. But we should really try to reframe or use grounding thoughts when we see ourselves in the mirror pinching this, pinching that, being like oh, I don't like my stretch marks here, or my boobs really couldn't use a lift, or, you know, fill in the blank. Whatever we view is not what we want it to look like.

Speaker 1 16:53

Yeah.

Speaker 2 16:55

And that's okay. We're going to have those struggles, we're human. But that's when we reframe and say, okay, I don't love this part about my body Appropriate.

Speaker 1 17:03

We can say that. Yeah, it's I think Pre-kids.

Speaker 2 17:06

There were parts of my body I did not like A hundred percent. But we can say but you know what? I have this, I have this, and now I have my daughters.

Speaker 1 17:15

Right.

Speaker 2 17:15

I have these stretch marks and now I have my daughters.

Speaker 1 17:19

Yeah.

Speaker 2 17:20

My boobs are flat because I breastfed my children.

Speaker 1 17:23

Uh-huh yeah.

Speaker 2 17:24

You know it's one of those. Yes, we're allowed to feel our feelings. Try not to dwell.

Speaker 1 17:30

Right.

Speaker 2 17:30

That's where we kind of tend to spiral and you know, intrusive thoughts and that whole rabbit hole Right, intrusive thoughts and that whole rabbit hole, right, but we can reframe and say, okay, I dislike this. However, this is the benefit that came from this sacrifice. Yeah, because motherhood is a sacrifice.

Speaker 1 17:49

Oh, it's the ultimate and it you know. I remember someone told me they're like Sarah. It took nine, almost 10 months for you to grow this child. Why would you not think it would take that long or longer for your body?

Speaker 2 18:03

Oh yeah.

Speaker 1 18:03

And your uterus alone takes like six weeks to get back to its normal shape.

Speaker 2 18:10

If not longer, if not longer. One of my friends sent me a really cool image because I had texted her a picture after I had my second child and I had just worn one of those t-shirt dresses and I sent her a picture. I was like it looks like I'm 12 weeks pregnant, but I'm not, and I was I don't know maybe a month postpartum could you still look pregnant?

Speaker 2 18:29

she sent me this really great image, or graphic that said when you give birth, the wound in your uterus is the size of a dinner-sized paper plate. That is the size of a wound inside of one of our organs.

Speaker 1 18:46

It's not going to heal overnight.

Speaker 1 18:48

And I will say and I've told people this, they're like how was your recovery from Will to James? And you know, will, I saw him in my uterus. James, he took that on out with him and it was so I sell on my uterus, james, he took that on out with him and it was so much easier without my uterus. Now my womb and everything started to go down, but like that uterus and I felt like my body got back to better shape without the uterus. So that just showed me again that uterus in there really well, really Well.

Speaker 2 19:17

there's going to be inflammation.

Speaker 1 19:19

Going to it takes a bit.

Speaker 2 19:20

It does, and then your periods.

Speaker 1 19:22

You're bleeding after for like a month or two, oh yeah, and then the first full period after. That's a whole nother thing. So I mean we're not saying here that you can't say I don't like my body after pregnancy. That's fine. We all have things that we don't like. That's normal. But don't get fixated that this is forever and this is who you are.

Speaker 2 19:47

That it is also that the faults that you dislike or that you see is a definition of your character.

Speaker 1 19:54

It does not. And, like you said, said when you're not sleeping, you're trying to figure out how you're even going to eat sleep function.

Speaker 2 20:01

Go to the bathrooms and challenge some days yeah and then if you have multiple kids, yeah, it's a whole balancing act here I am, five, five, nearly six years postpartum and then two years postpartum literally yesterday. I was just trying to go pee and both my children and the dog had to be in the bathroom with me.

Speaker 1 20:20

I mean, how dare you try to pee and pee swimming? I just needed 35 seconds and that was not allowed Butter's, like you're not doing that.

Speaker 2 20:28

Oh, y'all just have to know audience listening. We have a bass hound, her name is Butter, and she's nearly earned herself a trip back to the multiple times.

Speaker 1 20:36

Butter is going to be the Privy Alliance mascot, because Butter takes everything we say about self-care to heart, to the next level.

Speaker 2 20:45

She's all about some indulgence.

Speaker 1 20:47

And that's what we want your mom to hear. Now it's like listen, we get it.

Speaker 2 20:53

And it's.

Speaker 1 20:53

OK, hey, my body after baby. I don't like it in this moment, and that's OK. I'm looking at myself in the mirror. I don't like myself. Okay, this sucks. My hair has fallen out. My boobs are now saggy. I have this pouch. Okay, say it Voice, journal it. Yeah, get it out, get it out. Don't hold that in, don't try Mm-mm.

Speaker 2 21:13

Be, real.

Speaker 1 21:14

And if you want to do something to help yourself, let's take it small, let's set realistic. Yes, if that's going, we always take lots of for a walk. Walks can fix a lot of things. They really can. That sunlight, that fresh air, even if it's around the block. It doesn't have to be an hour long, but doing something physical will help you mentally Absolutely Throw the scale away if that's a fixation.

Speaker 2 21:38

Oh, absolutely yes.

Self-Care and Setting Boundaries

Speaker 1 21:40

I after James. I learned this the hard way, if will. I took my pre-baby clothes. I packed them away, yep. As you should, I was like I don't want to see them. I know I'll get there At some point, at some point. You know, if you are, you have a special thing you're like. I really want to feel good about myself. Yeah, there's a thing called Spanx. Yes, there's tricks and tips. Oh, yes.

Speaker 1 22:05

Even getting up and getting dressed and like, taking that time to take care of yourself will make your physical body just feel better, even if you've not, like changed the way your boobs are hanging, exactly.

Speaker 2 22:12

I mean for me with both my children. I would put them in their bouncy seat or swing and I'd pull them in the bathroom with me and take a shower that way, and you know what, most of the time it worked out well. Sometimes they cried the whole time I showered, but it's not like I'm taking a 30 minute shower.

Speaker 1 22:28

No, those days are long gone.

Speaker 2 22:31

Yeah, what is that that? Does not exist, but you know I could see them. Yeah, and you know what if they cry for two, three, four, five minutes?

Speaker 1 22:40

that's okay, I know that they're safe.

Speaker 2 22:42

Yeah, they may be upset or fussy, but it's okay that I also take care of myself.

Speaker 1 22:47

And if that's too, saying to your partner, to your children and I do this now that, especially with Will, since he's older, if he wakes up earlier he knows mom works out in the the mornings. I do that not necessarily to change my mom, but I do it for my mental health and I know you run for you. Yes, and that's something for you. So, making that time and saying, okay, it's walking, it's pilates, it's going downstairs into our, you know, and 10 minutes mommy's gonna do this workout online.

Speaker 1 23:13

You have so much free on youtube. There's ways to get it back, yeah, so you're not always stuck in that, but we don't have to rush, you don't have to rush that no one's in a marathon, no one's. No one's competing against you but yourself correct.

Speaker 1 23:26

And here's the thing too you also don't want to rush into exercise too quickly and hurt yourself and I did that with will because I was all just like I think my thing was, I was so triggered because people were like oh, how far along are you, or when are you due? And I didn't have him. So to me it was like I didn't want to face that, so for me, I was like I have to not look pregnant.

Speaker 2 23:47

Yeah, I can remember. After my second one was born I was I don't know three, four weeks postpartum and I just got on the treadmill and I just did a couple of miles jogging, not like full out run.

Speaker 1 23:59

Yeah.

Speaker 2 23:59

And I was like oh, I feel so good. Let me tell you, the next morning, when I woke up, literally my insides hurt and I thought oh, I started.

Speaker 1 24:10

I did too much. Too soon I started bleeding again. You know when I do too much. And that might be TMI, but it's like your body's like inside trying to heal and it's like you've done too much yeah.

Relationship Dynamics and Conclusion

Speaker 2 24:17

It's like, hey, pump the brakes, no more of that. And so that's when I realized, okay, I can't run yet. Yeah, I really shouldn't be able to, because we're not just healing from delivery, we are healing from nine or 10 months of pregnancy, which is when our organs get smushed and moved around Like a huge endurance race.

Speaker 1 24:34

It really is. It's like the ultra marathon, it really is, and so, and then your hormones are coming to play, and so just realize, like, even if you're not suffering from postpartum depression or anxiety, you're still crashing with your hormones, and so you're not looking at yourself with clear vision. Yeah, and now here's a whole other aspect is if your partner is supportive or not supportive of how you look.

Speaker 2 24:58

Yeah.

Speaker 1 24:59

And, I think, being honest with them Because, let's say, intimacy might not be something that you feel comfortable with.

Speaker 2 25:06

Not for a hot minute, because you don't feel like yourself. Well, yeah.

Speaker 1 25:11

Or, and it's like you're healing and it's that six-week thing is like that's not enough time.

Speaker 2 25:15

So Just saying, having open conversations, yeah, about that with them, that's never going to be a bad thing no, and here let me throw this in there if you have that conversation, say okay, I don't feel ready for x, y and z reasons, whether it is mental, physical whatever whatever it is, and you have that conversation with your significant other and they come back at you with anger and defensiveness. That's a red flag, yeah, that's not what you need, no it's one of those.

Speaker 2 25:51

If they say you know, I understand it's a hard thing to go through. Yeah, I'm a little disappointed that we got to pump the brakes, that's an appropriate reaction. Yeah, I can respect someone saying I'm disappointed, but when it's anger, whole different ball game. Defensiveness, whole different ball game and what would you advise them to do. I would really start to figure out boundaries with them and figure out is this a pattern of their behavior?

Speaker 1 26:17

or if this is just like we're all cutting this really confusing stage right now, because the newborn stage is hard on relationships yes very much. We've all I mean it's hard it's hard because no one's feeling like themselves.

Speaker 2 26:32

It's a huge adjustment.

Speaker 1 26:33

So I think that's a very important part is like look at, is this a one-time thing?

Speaker 2 26:37

yeah versus.

Speaker 1 26:37

Is this like you look back and you go, oh.

Speaker 2 26:41

Wait a second, or you start paying attention and you see it more regularly, so it almost keep track of that for a little bit so you can see if there is a pattern. Is this consistent or is it one of those? Your baby was up all night screaming. Nobody slept.

Speaker 1 26:55

And we're all on our last straw, exactly right.

Speaker 2 26:58

So just being aware of what can contribute to having a short fuse, which everybody is you know, everybody vulnerable to, or is this a pattern and we really can't identify an external trigger or component, things like that?

Speaker 1 27:14

and I think that's a very important thing with a lot of relationships not just this one In a lot of situations. Is it a one-time thing or is it a pattern? Yeah, and that stuff, and you can put that into yourself. Is my thoughts, my negative thoughts about myself, constant or is it because it's like I'm in this situation, yeah, or you know the algorithm.

Speaker 2 27:34

they know how to target us with ads.

Speaker 1 27:36

Oh, they do they know faster, Wait, fast, yeah, and then like so don't also like. I guess back to the mom bot thing real quick before we wrap this up is don't expose. If it's if you're struggling, unfollow people.

Speaker 2 27:52

Oh, absolutely.

Speaker 1 27:53

Don't watch the shows. Give yourself that. I don't need to put that in my mind. Guard yourself. Guard rails. I'm not in the good space right now.

Speaker 2 28:05

I'm doing the best I can.

Speaker 1 28:06

And guess what Mom bod can be empowering?

Speaker 2 28:10

Heck yeah. It can be the best body you've ever had, because look what you've accomplished with it.

Speaker 1 28:14

So we're proud of you.

Speaker 2 28:17

We wear our mom bods too.

Speaker 1 28:19

That's right and we'll talk. I think this is a great subject. We can always talk more about it, Absolutely. But keep sending us your guys If you have questions. You want us to talk more? Don't forget to follow us on Instagram.

Speaker 2 28:28

We put a lot of good tips, we're going to be a positive influence on Instagram.

Speaker 1 28:31

Yes, we are Not that negative yeah.

Speaker 2 28:33

We're not preying on your vulnerabilities.

Speaker 1 28:35

No, Just throwing that out there. All right, guys, Till next time, All right, See ya. Maternal mental health is as important as physical health. The Preview Alliance podcast was created for and by moms dealing with postpartum depression and all its variables, like anxiety, anger and even apathy. Hosted by CEO founder Sarah Parkhurst and licensed clinical social worker Whitney Gay, each episode focuses on specific issues relevant to pregnancy and postpartum. Join us and hear how other moms have overcome mental health challenges, as well as access tips and suggestions on dealing with your own challenges as moms. You can also browse our podcast library and listen to previous episodes at any time. Please know you're not alone on this journey. We're here to help.