SPEAKER_02: 0:09

Hey guys, welcome to Preview Lions Podcast. I am Sarah. This is Whitney. Hey, we survived the holidays, Whitney, but we're in this weird, it's called the in-between week. I looked it up. It's literally like a thing of we have survived Thanksgiving and Christmas. New Year's is upon us, but we're like in this weird where I'm not eating pie. I'm not worried about gifts. I'm trying to still figure out where to put up the toys. My kids are out of school, my work schedule's off. Yep. I don't know if I should like you just be here or not.

SPEAKER_00: 0:45

And eat whatever you want in the morning.

SPEAKER_02: 0:47

Like, yeah. Yeah. It's the survival. Yes. We're in this really weird. What do we do with it? And plus, it's like the new year is coming, right? And we have this pressure of the start. Like it's this weird thing of what's to come, but we're still in this year. And maybe we're having letdown. Maybe it's like the holidays didn't work out how we wanted. Maybe we had family conflict. Maybe it's a first holiday without a loved one. Maybe it's you know, you overwhelmed yourself, and you're like, Wash, or you're thinking, I just thought it'd be a little bit different.

SPEAKER_00: 1:30

Right. Well, and also there is such that big buildup leading to Christmas, and then it's over. It's a day and then it's over. But I mean, truly, we start building up for Christmas and you know, late September, early October, like Christmas on.

SPEAKER_02: 1:47

It's on.

SPEAKER_00: 1:48

Right. Like, even stores have out the Christmas decorations before Halloween is coming gone. And so, you know, you gotta think we have at least two, potentially three months where we are building up to Christmas. We are planning, we're trying to figure out what gifts to give people, what is the budget gonna look like? Are we taking a trip? You know, all of those different logistical things, even they take up that brain space. And then, you know, as a mom of still little kids, you know, five and eight, where the magic is still there, it is that constant. How do I make sure that I make this one that they can remember? Like, how do I make this good for them? And I will say that's almost like the drawback of being a therapist is you have, you know, these adults come in and they look back on their child, and I'm like, oh, I gotta make sure I don't do that for my kids, you know. I want to make sure they can look back on it fondly. And so then that pressure is on me for a good two and a half months while maintaining all the other things, you know. So then we get to Christmas and it happens and it could be great, and then it's over.

SPEAKER_02: 2:54

It's over. It's like post-vacation letdown in a holiday season, right? You know, you've been on this great vacation and you come home and you're like, wait, what? You know, reality slaps us in the face of what's to come. And you have been going 50 miles an hour and you could be exhausted, you'd be burnt out, like your digestive system might be like, I can't eat another sugary sweet, I gotta get this together.

SPEAKER_00: 3:16

Right.

SPEAKER_02: 3:16

And then you truly holidays are such a trigger if you are already experiencing anxiety depression, or you were dealing with grief, or if you were wanting a baby and that did not happen for you this year, you had a loss, you had a miscarriage, you you know, or your your child's in the hospital and then nick you, and that was not that's not what you anticipated, and so it's this in-between where you're kind of left with the aftermath, but you're right in front of a new year and the pressure of the new year. Those darn resolutions, which we don't do resolutions, we do not.

SPEAKER_00: 3:54

I hate new resolutions.

SPEAKER_02: 3:56

So many people do, to the point that 64% of Americans they make resolutions. I believe 91% of them fail by February because it's bringing up like I should do better, your point out your inaccuracies, right? And you have the guilt and shame. And 62% of mothers, speaking of all the holiday pies we've ate, say that they in January specifically are triggered by body image issues.

SPEAKER_00: 4:24

Well, sure. And I, you know, here's the thing, too. We think about diet culture back in the late 90s, early 2000s. Diet culture loves to come back around this time of year. Yes, you know, this is where you're gonna hit up that gym membership. And you know what? I would dare say 95% of gyms, no enrollment fee in the month of January. You don't have to pay your registration fees. Come on in, join us, start the new year the right way.

SPEAKER_02: 4:54

You're gonna hear those taglines, yep.

SPEAKER_00: 4:57

But then I'm like, well, what have I been doing wrong? Well, now I feel like I've got character flaws because I did eat that brownie with my kids. You know what? Santa ate those cookies, and you know, FYI, I'm Santa. I ate the cookies, you know, and so we start to feel bad about ourselves, and so sometimes looking at the new year, it can feel daunting and intimidating because we feel like we kind of have to get ourselves together in three days because the new year's coming in three days. Well, I'm sorry, no one can get themselves 100% together in three days. No, it's not gonna happen. And so here we have maybe the letdown of the buildup of the holidays. The house is a wreck, physical clutter creates mental clutter. Our diets are just not the best. You know, I'm not going to push diet fads, but like I promise you, we are not eating our fruits and veggies the way that we need to be eating them in December, myself included. So there's so many things that are already kind of just off as far as our total well-being. And then we have this pressure to get it together and to do right and be more perfect in three days, and that's not actually feasible. And it's actually a very manipulative marketing tactic. Yes, it can be really hard to come up from that, it can be hard to recognize that that's what it is.

SPEAKER_02: 6:23

Well, and then you look at the year ahead and you go, I want to do this different, I want to do that different, or you know, you it just it is a time of reflection, but really it should be the time of rest because you have ran a marathon since probably before Halloween when everything has started with the holidays and the pressure and your school and your work. So you have to give your space and time and permission because you are feeling fatigued. Well, that is normal response right now, right? We need to talk about our nervous systems. I mean, even the fact that like we've probably been like amped up, we've seen the lights, we've seen the music, we've done this, our schedules are off, we're not sleeping right. Our nervous systems are kind of just like still on that edge.

SPEAKER_00: 7:08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02: 7:09

We we're lacking structure in our lives, right? We don't know what day it is.

SPEAKER_00: 7:12

The overload is just through the roof.

SPEAKER_02: 7:16

So, what is some takeaway tips that they can be like, okay, Whitney, we know we're a hot mess this week. We know things are apart. What can we actually do that's gonna help?

SPEAKER_00: 7:27

So when we think about this, we want to make it realistic, achievable goals. And we're gonna take away all of anything that could be character defining or value associated with it. So if you don't achieve the goal, you're not a bad person. That's not a character flaw, is what I mean by that. So if you're anything like me, I'm gonna tell myself here, and I'm sure some people will be like, oh my goodness, Whitney, I don't really like Christmas that much, and I haven't for many, many years. So when I tell you the day after Christmas, I want my decorations down, put them in the tubs, get them out my sight. Okay, I am tired of it, but I have children. So I do not take it down the day after Christmas because I have children that would be very, very distraught if I did such. But you know what? There are some things that I can go ahead and declutter, whether it is just the trash in the kitchen, like I just need to take the trash out. Maybe that will make me feel a little bit more together. Maybe it is one of those you think ahead of time, okay. We know we're gonna get an influx of toys. Let's, you know, get your kids involved too. Make them pick out three things that they don't play with anymore or it's broken, and we get rid of it. That way you're making space for things.

SPEAKER_03: 8:50

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00: 8:51

You know, and even after Christmas, because you they always get more toys than you anticipate. It's always a thing. And so, even afterwards, saying, Okay, you've got 10 extra toys that came in for Christmas, let's find five things. Because 10 may seem overwhelming to your kids in the moment. Yeah, so let's start with five and you can help them.

SPEAKER_03: 9:13

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00: 9:14

And so figuring out different ways that you can declutter in very tangible ways. And again, it could be that you take out the trash, it could be that you load the dishwasher, get it out of the sink. That way it's not in your line of vision.

SPEAKER_03: 9:28

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00: 9:29

That's something that can be super, super helpful. You know, depending on where you live and kind of the temps and things like that. Maybe you say, okay, I'm going to get out for a 10-minute walk.

SPEAKER_03: 9:39

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00: 9:40

And it's not for the purpose of losing weight. It we are not burning our calories, we're not worried about calorie burning. You are not watching your watch to see how many calories you burn on this walk. That is irrelevant. I do not want you thinking about that. But you could say, I'm gonna go walk for 10 minutes and I'm gonna make sure that I can drink at least 50 ounces of water today. Yeah. Again, small things, small, small things that you can do. It could be that, you know, a day or two after Christmas, you go to the store and you get the veggie tray. That way you have pre-chopped veggies right there at your fingertips and you can incorporate them into your meals more.

SPEAKER_03: 10:21

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00: 10:22

Just little, little things that you can do to make yourself start to feel better. So when I say small, realistic, achievable goals, I mean it.

unknown: 10:34

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00: 10:34

Like we're not going to have the whole house put back together the day after Christmas, deep cleaned, baseboard script. No. Why on earth are you gonna do that to yourself? Yeah, that's no, we're not doing that. But you know what? You can buy some already chopped fruit and have that in the fridge.

unknown: 10:52

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00: 10:53

You can do that. You can have extra oranges lying around. You can have the veggie tray. You can say, okay, today my goal is that I'm gonna take out the trash in the kitchen and the bathrooms. Okay, that's that's doable. We can manage that. So give yourself some things that are doable but also beneficial.

SPEAKER_02: 11:14

Yeah. A little rest and reset and tell yourself, you know, rest is productive, right? So giving yourself take a little nap if you need to when you're baby naps. If it is like you say, okay, guys, we're gonna do a movie night and we're just gonna, you know, physically rest your body and enjoy it with your kids. If it's taking off, you know, uh social media comparison trap. If you're like, I I everybody's already got their house back together on Instagram. I'm gonna go off Instagram. If it's I'm struggling with my grief, I'm struggling with my unmet expectations, I'm struggling with this that really got highlighted in the hall. I'm gonna make a plan to start therapy. Right. Things that are doable. Doable, doable that's not resolutions, but it's an intention. And it's a thing, like you said, that doesn't say, well, if I don't do X, I'm I'm failure, right? It's things that are going to better us and going to give us a little rest because this in-between week is odd. We're all feeling it, and there is such a thing as the post-holiday blues. So even if you are noticing yourself feeling like a little more sad, you're probably not the only person that's feeling that way.

SPEAKER_00: 12:26

Correct. Thousand percent.

SPEAKER_02: 12:29

And just remember what Whitney said. If you see it happening, you're getting targeted, it's new you, these resolutions just realize it's part of the marketing game. This is not the week to determine the new you. This is the week to reset, enjoy, connect. And if there is things to reflect on and change, write it down. Voice journalist, meditation, short walks, starting therapy, connecting with someone you haven't talked to, and just say, Hey, I just miss you. Little things like that can make a huge difference.

SPEAKER_00: 13:03

Right, absolutely.

SPEAKER_02: 13:05

Well, Whitney, my friend, we will see you in 2026 along with our listeners.

SPEAKER_00: 13:10

I'm a word, 2026. That's wild.

SPEAKER_02: 13:12

So we're here, we'll be with you next year, and we're wishing you guys a great in-between week and a wonderful happy new year.

SPEAKER_00: 13:19

That's right. Happy New Year.

SPEAKER_01: 13:24

Maternal mental health is as important as physical health. The Preview Alliance podcast was created for and by moms dealing with postpartum depression and all its variables like anxiety, anger, and even apathy. Hosted by CEO, founder Sarah Parkers, and licensed clinical social worker Whitney Gay, each episode focuses on specific issues relevant to pregnancy and postpartum. Join us and hear how other moms have overcome mental health challenges as well as access tips and suggestions on dealing with your own challenges as moms. You can also browse our podcast library and listen to previous episodes at any time. Please know you're not alone on this journey. We're here to help.